BWAHAHA I'M SO AWESOME.

You know what irks me? Well, other than everything, rap lyrics annoy me to no end. I suppose I could take them all apart one by one and tell you why they suck more than a starved anteater, but I don't have that kind of attention span. But, not being so cruel as to deprive you of my blatantly one-sided argument, I'll explain to you why you should all start complaining to your radio stations right this very second because they play this song.


MR. LONELY by Akon.

Yo this one here goes out to all my playas out there ya kno got that one good girl whose always been there like ya
Kno took all the bullshit then one day she cant take it no more and decides to leave

I woke up in the middle of the night and I noticed my girl wasn't by my side, coulda sworn I was dreamin, for her I was
Feenin, so I hadda take a little ride, back tracking ova these few years, tryna figure out wat I do to make it go bad, cuz
Ever since my girl left me, my whole life came crashin

This one goes out to all your 'playas' now does it? Well, why are you associating yourself with these whores in the first place? Oh yeah! Because you are one. So this loving woman (God knows what kept her with you. Your lack of decent grammar alone would so make me go restraining-order on your ass) put up with all your 'bullshit' and leaves you (good on her!). Then one night, she is miraculously not by your side! (assuming that she left you before) Hmmm... well seeing that you put her through all that 'bullshit' (physical abuse? Emotional abuse? Your lack of worth to this society? Pick one.) it's no wonder she's suddenly gone. So why must you take a little ride to figure out what went wrong?

Cant belive I hadda girl like you and I just let you walk right outta my life, after all I put u thru u still stuck
Around and stayed by my side, what really hurt me is I broke ur heart, baby you were a good girl and I had no right, I
Really wanna make things right, cuz without u in my life girl

Hm. You let her walk out of your life? Good on you, because otherwise I'm pretty sure you would have gotten yourself a few assault arrests. What hurt you is you broke her heart? OH NO11!1onethree1!11 I BROKE YOUR HEART SO NOW IT'S YOUR FAULT111! BLAMEBLAMEBLAME1two11!11 ITS ALL YOUR FAULT THAT I'M LIKE THIS11!threeexclamationmark11!

Ahem.

Been all about the world ain't neva met a girl that can take the things that you been through
Never thought the day would come where you would get up and run and I would be out chasing u
Cuz aint nowhere in the globe id rather be, aint noone in the globe id rather see then the girl of my dreams that made me
Be so happy but now so lonely

That's great. Go play in traffic now. I'm sure you won't be missed by any women's groups, or the law, or any self-respecting person, for that matter. Your dirty man-whore buddies might miss you, but that won't be for long.

Never thought that id be alone, I didnt hope you'd be gone this long, I jus want u to call my phone, so stop playing girl and
Come on home (come on home), baby girl I didn't mean to shout, I want me and you to work it out, I never wished Id ever
Hurt my baby, and its drivin me crazy cuz...

Fantastic, but I think you blew your chance by beating your girlfriend. Sorry, to tell you this, but you screwed it up for yourself. Passing the blame onto some woman who deserves better than you isn't going to make it any better.

Do you not love me? Well, since you want so badly to hear about my day, I'm going to not give you any updates whatsoever.